New interview of CLARA FRAGO DAZA a
SANTIAGO FRAGO VALLS.
“Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternative” (Maurice Chevalier)
CFD. We have read: “Sexological Counseling for the Elderly in Zaragoza”; Do you think that not enough attention is paid to the sexual dimension of the elderly?
Santiago Frago: Absolutely. The sexuality of the elderly has been an invisible reality until a few years ago. The lack of sexological studies has been inherent to the stage of old age and there has been a marginalization of sexuality in areas of scientific interest; and the reasons have to do with attitudes towards this sexual reality.
With the launch of this innovative and pioneering Service, in collaboration with the Zaragoza City Council, we intend to defend the fact of Sexuality of the Elderly, which is, in short, to defend the erotic and loving future of all.
CFD. ¿Why do you talk about the sexual revolution of the elderly?
SFI equate the term “revolution” with profound change; and one of the great sexological changes in these last 30 years has undoubtedly been to make the sexuality of the elderly visible. At present the elderly are in very good health, maintain an active aging and therefore maintain and express, many of them, a love and erotic interest.
CFD. ¿Is sexual and love interest an indication of a comprehensive quality of life and a predictor of good health?
SF: Indeed, sexuality and love keep you in touch with life. At present, sexual health constitutes a variable linked to the idea of general health that is proclaimed by the World Health Organization (WHO). In fact, clinical reality tells us that certain and serious health problems have an erotic (sexual) difficulty as their first symptom, both in men and women.
CFD. But can you enjoy sex at any age? Is there a sexual retirement age? Is it normal to be interested in sex from the age of 75?
SF: Yes. The erotic and loving desire does not have much to do with age; Sexual retirement, that is, feeling, living and expressing oneself as a sexed person has no age, and the same could be said of desire, attraction, gaze, seduction, smile, charm, humor, love, the need for pampering and caressing, the need to care and take care of yourself … all that is not lost with age.
CFD. But does not having a birthday lead to a biological and sexual decline? Is it normal to have sexual difficulties due to the natural fact of having a birthday?
SF: Having a birthday entails a biological decline but not necessarily “sexual”, as long as health is reasonably accompanied. Just for the fact of having a birthday, it is not normal to have sexual difficulties; However, adding years does facilitate the appearance of diseases and the need to take drugs; the sum of both can cause some expression of our erotic life to be somewhat limited. Although of course, that does not mean that erotic expression is not possible.
CFD. Why are older people abandoning their sex life?
SF: There are several reasons among which I would highlight:
- Health problems and side effects of medications
- Sexual disinterest of the partner
- Fidelity to the deceased partner
- Abandonment of the male for fear of presenting sexual difficulties or “fear of not being up to the task”
- Alcohol, obesity, or physical or mental decline
- False beliefs, myths and fears
- Fear of the reaction of families
- Lack of privacy or complex logistics
- Very restrictive senior residences
CFD. Do you point out as a reason for abandoning your intimate life the fact of false beliefs and myths, what are those myths and how do they affect the elderly?
SF: They are myths related in the first place, with a model of historical sexuality closely linked to the procreative fact, which draws an erotic scenario very focused on genitality, which obviously limits the erotic possibilities of older people and which makes the constructed “sexualities” from that range are not taken into account; second, the consideration of menopause as the end of sexual life in women; and thirdly, the false belief that certain diseases can get worse if we have sex… when it is usually just the opposite.
However, the change has started and the attitude towards these realities has changed. Older people already perceive love and aging in the key of Gabriel García Márquez: “Men think that they stop falling in love when they get old, without knowing that they grow old when they stop falling in love.”
CFD. Do sexual difficulties that occur in advanced ages have a solution?
Currently, Sexology and Sexual Medicine offer diverse therapeutic tools that allow solving and / or facilitating the sexual life of people who have some difficulty in their intimate and / or loving sphere. Help may consist of sexological counseling, sexual and couples therapy, pharmacological support, natural medicine, physiosexology, healthy lifestyle and an awakening of the senses.
 This Service had a 1st stage between 2007 and 2012. After 6 years of interruption, a 2nd stage began in November 2018.
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The sexual revolution of the elderly | Amalthea Blog
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