Sex Education or Pornography, confused teenagers

Pornography is occupying the space of sex education. The data seems to confirm it. Minors access the Internet looking for information that is not offered to them by families or schools. And they find content that is not created to inform or educate. The confusion grows while sex education continues to be the pending issue at home and adults look the other way.

Sex Education or Pornography? These are two antagonistic realities that should not be mixed but are confused in the minds of adolescents. Sex education continues to be conspicuous by its absence and this information gap leads minors to search and share their findings on the internet among their peer groups. And false and distorted information spreads.

This is not something new. The data indicates that access to pornographic content is made from increasingly younger ages. The age of the first communion, over 11 years, means access to the desired mobile that opens a window to a virtual world without filters. Fathers and mothers still don’t dare to talk about sexuality at home and don’t know how to do it. Or they do it from prohibition and fear.

Girls and boys between 14 and 17 years old recognize that their priority sources of sexual information continue to be older friends (36.6%) and pornographic materials (20%). In other words, most of the sexual information recognized by adolescents themselves comes from unreliable sources or that, directly, are not created to inform.

You may be interested Where do we learn about sexuality? where I talk more extensively about our study carried out in Granada with more than 4,000 adolescents about real and desired sources of sexual information.

when we ask them “Who would you like to inform you about sexuality?” They say it very clearly: experts in sexology and, secondly, the parents themselves. This data is interesting because it places responsibility for sexual information at home and in the hands of trained professionals. The ball is in our court and sex education is still not done.

«The data indicates that access to pornographic content is made from increasingly younger ages. The age of the first communion, over 11 years, means access to the desired mobile that opens a window to a virtual world without filters«

The misinformation problem grows exponentially. Before it was a magazine that was shared among a small group but now it is photos and videos that circulate massively. Porn is not meant to inform or educate. Neither for the access of minors, without training or filters that make them confuse fiction with reality. It is important to say that porn is fiction and that its objective is to stimulate the erotica of adults. Just as we don’t believe that alien movies are real, the same thing happens with porn. It is an industry for adults that shows fantasies and content that does not correspond to reality.

As I said, the problem does not lie in the existence of pornography, questionable in many ways for transmitting a distorted image of sex and focused on aggressive sexual models. He too continues to use the image of women as sexual objects in the service of male pleasure, reducing sexuality to little more than a quick, gymnastic encounter. Of course it is not made to educate. The problem is the lack of information and sexual education which is still not done. And that leaves a hole and a need to be informed unattended. Consequently, it is normal that this desire to know leads to searching in the wrong places if no better ones are found.

The consequences are negative Fears and bodily complexes spread. I have attended very young people who do not dare to interact because they consider themselves inadequate or physically insufficient. The fear of having a small penis is common. The scare of first sexual intercourse that looks quick and easy in the movies. Images and models that do not reflect the real needs and desires of adolescents but that push them into fast, unsafe and, in many cases, unwanted sex.

What can we do about this? The first step is recognize that our sons and daughters are sexual persons from birth and that they have a natural need to know and understand their world. From the earliest years it is correct to respect and answer their questions as well as show a positive attitude towards their doubts and questions about sexuality. Where do children come from? Are women and men different? How are the first sexual relations? How to live them without risks and without fear?

The most important thing is to show ourselves as available fathers and mothers. We may not have all the answers, but we can find them together. The most important thing is the attitude of respect and acceptance towards our children. Simply prohibiting and closing their eyes is only useful to close the circle of isolation and distrust in the adult that they have already developed. And that they feel alone in a world that is too complicated in which they must relate and be happy.

Transmit a concept of sexuality as pleasure and communication, learning to say that «no» if something does not feel like it, understand the risks of unwanted pregnancies and transmission of sexual infections. Help them feel safe and prepared to achieve their first happy relationships. And also their first satisfying and fearless sexual experiences.

Closing our eyes and not wanting to see will only perpetuate the spiral of taboo and concealment that we have inherited and that we know where it leads. Do not leave our children alone It is our main function as parents. And show ourselves available, whether we like it or not what they think or decide to do. Always guide, respond and, above all, believe in their good judgment, showing our support and understanding. and warn that not everything you see on the internet may be real. Help them develop a critical sense of life and navigate with good judgment in the real world and in the virtual world.

You may be interested in listening to my collaboration program with Radio Albolote where I talk about «Sex Education or Pornography: Confused Teenagers

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Sex Education or Pornography, confused teenagers


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