I went to a cunnilingus workshop… – Sexy Therapy

Last Wednesday I attended a workshop entitled “The Secrets of Cunnilingus” out of curiosity. It was given by the psychologist and sexologist Ana Lombardía. An excellent professional that I recommend reading on her website www.sexoenlapiel.com. And if you are in Madrid, try to go to one of his workshops.

cunnilingus

My intention in this workshop was to attend as an observer and listener and of course to find out if there really was any secret to performing good oral sex on a woman; Or at least one that I hadn’t heard of before. Fortunately, in the end it turned out to be a good workshop where the importance of feeling more than technique was discussed.

And I say thank goodness because the really important thing when having good oral sex (whether it’s a woman or a man) is the desire to both do it and receive it. Without pressure, without conditions and without feeling the “obligation” to comply. And the workshop was mainly along those lines, in addition to talking about the anatomy of the vulva and vagina. All in all, a very interesting couple of hours. Anyway, I drew my own conclusions and that is why both Ana and I want to collaborate to add a touch of practice to their workshops. General but not infallible techniques (because they do not exist) that further help all people interested in learning to improve their sexuality.

But what caught my attention most about the workshop were its participants. There were no lesbian women (I guess they already know that there are no tricks in oral sex, just enjoy it) and the men who attended were middle-aged except for one younger one.

It seemed as the talk progressed that they had been attracted by the title of the workshop “The secrets of cunnilingus” because with each passing minute their participation was decreasing until it became silent in such a way that it seemed that they wanted it to end so they could go home. disappointed. Because that’s the word that I think defined their faces.

From their few words, the ones they released at the beginning of the workshop, I could deduce that they had come to really know those secrets that they resist to make a good pussy meal. They wanted in two hours to become the great lovers they have never known how to be. Or at least that was my general feeling. I WANT to be a great lover. I WANT to drive my partner(s) crazy, I WANT to know how to set off fireworks. Me, me, me, me and more me. They were not demanding but the I was implicit many times in their words.

On the other hand, they did not listen. They didn’t seem interested in where the clitoris was, for example, or where the G-spot was, but only how to stimulate them to clap their hands. It’s like wanting to drive without a car… but the most curious thing of all, because it was worth watching, was when another man (in this case me) sided with the sexologist. They activated their “alpha male” genes to impose their opinions acquired by the patriarchal culture and society. None of their opinions were of themselves. They were all I have read…; studies show…; without stopping to think about what they really said and what Ana was really trying to convey to them. Especially when it came to who had more sexual desire if the man or the woman… And there is still something more amazing: Their faces of «this woman is crazy » when he told them that something very, very important at the time of oral sex was communication. I hallucinated pickles. Not only had they not thought of it, but it seemed like bullshit. How could they ask how they are doing and if they want better this way or that! Please!

Anyway, the conclusion I was able to draw is that despite the joy it gives to see how a man is able to attend a workshop on sexuality, there is still a lot of work to be done to eliminate or at least reduce their egos. Well, for them the most important thing is not to enjoy what they do, but that the woman cums very fast, a lot and only thanks to them; and that they recognize it, of course, so that later they can brag to their friends about how well they eat it or even use it as a method of flirting (infallible of course! Right women?).

As Ana Lombardía used to say and that I subscribe to, good oral sex involves wanting to do it because you like it. Not to look good, not so that they can suck you later or to be told that you are the one who does it best. It is also not a “foreplay” (I hate that concept) or an attempt to fix cumming too fast and the partner not enjoying penetration.

Eating a pussy is like a kiss. I’m not doing it to make you horny. I do it because I like it. I do it because he makes me horny. I do it because I enjoy. I eat your pussy because when I put my head between your legs, time stops. And I don’t think about whether you cum, whether you like it (because if you leave me it’s because you like it, not to do me a favor) or whether you’re going to suck me later. My only thought is to eroticize myself, follow your rhythm, enjoy your wiggles and your panting breath; of your moans or your screams; drink the nectar that comes from your pussy. Because the real secret of a cunnilingus is: Pleasure for pleasure and above all PRACTICE!

¡But Sexitiv@s!

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I went to a cunnilingus workshop… – Sexy Therapy


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