How to enjoy (even) more your sex

Today we are going to talk about why many women fail to enjoy sex. Eh, but if you are a man, do not close the browser, this interests you because I am going to give you tips to fully satisfy your partner. Shall we start?

Enjoying sex in another way is possible

A large number of women come to consultation because they are not satisfied with sex. When they explain to me what a sexual relationship is for them, most of them talk exclusively about penetration. In sexology we call this “coitocentrism”, and among my friends I call it “a whore”.

And it is that for women, coitocentrismo entails a high possibility of failure. It is very difficult for a woman to reach orgasm practicing only penetration. According to a recent study, up to 40% of women are dissatisfied with their sexual relations, because neither her partner nor herself stimulates the clitoris, nor any erogenous zone during intercourse. And when penetration occurs, the woman is neither stimulated, excited nor lubricated, and this can even lead to pain during penetration.

Why are we so fixated on penetration?

Coitocentrism comes from afar. Until recently, sex was used to procreate, and for this the man had to ejaculate inside the woman (something that is only achieved with penetration). Only the pleasure of the man was sought and that of the woman did not matter (a minute of silence for those old ladies). All this began to be questioned the day the clitoris was discovered.

1648645490 29 How to enjoy even more your“The happiest day of my life”

Then came the beginning to understand sex as a way to have fun, and the woman realized that her body was more than just a “machine” to engender, she could also enjoy herself.

1648645490 782 How to enjoy even more your“effectivewonder”

Long live penetration! and long live a thousand other things!

Sex is not just penetration. There are as many practices as there are imaginations, and it’s a shame that we always stick to penetration, especially because of what we say that women find it harder to reach orgasm just by being penetrated.

Be careful, we are not saying that with penetration the woman does not obtain pleasure, which of course, but it helps (and a lot) that she has previously been excited and lubricated. And this is only achieved with caresses, touches, kisses, games, touching, licking… she doing it and receiving it too.

All of these things are essential for arousal, lubrication, and concentration. Once the woman enjoys all of this, she will be ready for the penetration to be a success and the couple is ready to enjoy sex.

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Another sex is possible: sexual intercourse without penetration exists (and is fine)

The definition of sexual intercourse is the enjoyment of both, so that in the best of cases, an orgasm is reached. And for all this to happen, penetration is not necessary: ​​both men and women can get through masturbation, oral sex, friction… with what Any sexual activity that generates pleasure and orgasms is considered sexual intercourse..

This does not mean that penetration is undervalued, moreover, many women enjoy it very much and it gives them a lot of pleasure. What I want to say is penetration is just as valid as any other practice where there is no penetration, since the goal is still pleasure and orgasm.

Just think of a couple of homosexual girls, would they be considered to be having sexual relations? obviously yes, and they manage to enjoy sex even if there is no penetration.

“My partner only understands sex as penetration”

Wow, that’s a shame. But it has a solution: once again communication with our partner is the key to reaching an understanding. In this case, if our partner is coitocentric and does not practice other things, the solution is to talk to him about it. Express your sexual dissatisfaction and propose to enrich your sexual life by introducing other things into it. As always, tact and respect is key.

Men also enjoy other things a lot (although their goal is penetration), and they will surely get much more excited: not only because of games and caresses, but also because they will see their partner really excited. It’s a win-win situation!

1648645490 395 How to enjoy even more yourHappy sex = happy couple

Okay, you’ve convinced me… but what do I do?

Sex begins from the beginning of erotica until it ends, that is: there are a wide variety of options when it comes to doing things. Enjoying sex will depend a bit on the imagination of each one, but here are some suggestions. Take note:

  • Prepare everything to enjoy sex: Candles, romantic music, a good sexy outfit, a special dinner can be put on. Or the dinner on you (chocolate, cream… or like poor Samantha in Sex and the City… sushi!)

How to enjoy even more your

  • erotic games. There are many, of all kinds and they are very effective. For example, invent a character, dress like him and interpret him (doctor, cleaner, stranger…). Invent or search the internet. There are also physical games that you can find in specialized stores. And very fun and exciting “board” type games.
  • Petting. That is, touching the bodies without penetration, but imitating the movements.
  • Caresses, sensual massages, licking body parts, like for example the toes (but please, in a sensual way, not “in the cow way”). All with delicacy and sensuality.
  • Kisses: they are essential, not only in the mouth, but throughout the body. Neck, ears, thighs…
  • Phrases: They can get very exciting. You can for example describe what you want them to do to you, or what you are going to do. There are those who like to have poetry recited or who enjoys being insulted. That said, he discovers that he puts you / him.
  • Take advantage of the erogenous zones: caresses, kisses, licks… on the inside of the thighs, near the sexual organs, the neck, the earlobe, the ear… these are the most common, but each person has a special place. Enjoy finding it.
  • oral sex: This practice is very exciting and stimulating, as long as it is done delicately, gently. And he deserves a post for him (coming soon)
  • Masturbation: stimulating the clitoris well is the most exciting for women, being able to have orgasms only with this. And the same happens to the man, a good stimulation of his genitals can easily cause orgasms.
  • And sincerely: anything. As long as you both feel comfortable and enjoy yourself, everything is allowed.

And to finish this article about enjoying sex, I close with two things that I don’t like at all about this topic:

  • That everything explained above (alternative sexual activities to penetration), be called «preliminaries«. If you notice I haven’t used that word once. Because although it refers to the same thing we have talked about (touching, caressing, kissing, oral sex)… it implies that it is “preliminary”. That is, it “precedes something”. Guess what? Exactly, to the penetration…

1648645490 967 How to enjoy even more yourThis is me when I hear the word “foreplay”

  • That the gynecologist asks if you have had “complete sexual relations” to ask you if you have ever been penetrated. A complete sexual relationship is a sexual encounter in which orgasm is reached. Be that as it may (with penetration or not). The next time your gynecologist asks you this, send him this post 😉


*let’s get comfortable and enrich our sexual life and increase our pleasure. If with your partner you only practice penetration, have a conversation. He will appreciate it, your excitement is his. So talk and start enjoying your sex in a new way.

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How to enjoy (even) more your sex


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