Decreased libido: when and why to consult? Advice from sex therapists

Decreased desire or lack of libido?
Consult a sex therapist online on Mia.co

Consult an online sex therapist by phone, messaging or video, 7 days a week.

Low libido: symptoms

How does a drop in libido manifest itself? Camille Bataillon, clinical sexologist and couple’s therapist, explains:

This is an absence or reduction in interest in sexual activity for at least 3 months; it can be just as much about masturbation as it is about having sex with other people. And where it can become problematic for someone is when this absence or reduced interest in sexual activity has lasted for several months, and becomes an embarrassment, even pain.

In these cases, do not hesitate to consult an online sex therapist, confirms Camille Bataillon, because there are possible solutions that a sex therapist can find.

The beginning of a relationship, a stimulating period for the libido

At the start of a relationship, we often notice that the libido is more active, that the two partners are perhaps more synchronized, or that at least the desire is perhaps more externalized. Rather, sex is done naturally. And where we can be wrong, it is in thinking that it will last over time: this is not true for any couple!

And that’s normal: at the start of a relationship, there is a very strong excitement; novelty is stimulating. But gradually, the novelties can be less present, and the excitement a little less strong.

In fact, specifies Camille Bataillon, it is quite possible to avoid the sexual routine, by continuing to work, to cultivate this eroticism in you, but also in the couple.

We often notice in a couple that lasts, a certain dynamism; that is to say that there will be a partner who will initiate the relationship. If it is always the same person initiating, it is common for this to lead to a drop in libido at one point or another, especially if the other person is not necessarily favorable to the sexual request.

However, it is not because we want our partner more or less that we no longer love them: we have to differentiate the affective from the sexual.

Why differentiate the affective from the sexual?

We can very well have people who are extremely in love with their partner but who have a little lower sexual desire, whether it is occasional, recurring or permanent.

It should also be noted that within the couple, it is very common to have different levels of desires. If this causes frustration or discomfort, it is possible to see a sex therapist online at any point in life.

With a sex therapist, it is possible to put things in place and she will suggest concrete ways to improve the situation in the couple.

Decreased libido: why and when to consult?

With a sex therapist, it is possible to work on a decrease in libido on 3 points, among others.

The first point concerns more psycho-education; that is, to get to know your body better: what turns me on? What gives me pleasure? It will be possible to work on these different points in order to build up sufficient “baggage” to fuel sexual arousal.

It will also be possible to work on fantasies; some sexologists say that the more a person has regular sexual fantasies, the more it boosts the libido. We can also use suitable erotic media: porn, erotic audios, erotic readings… In short, anything that can feed sexual excitement.

And then, you will also have to think about your relationship: if you’re in a relationship, how is this relationship going? What is he possibly lacking, in order to perhaps liberate himself sexually?

Finally, other methods can allow you to “let go” or to understand sexual intercourse in a different way, thanks to mindfulness exercises, meditation or sophrology …

Moreover, slow-sex (the fact of taking your time during a report and discovering new sensations) can also make it possible to rekindle the flame in a couple, and give rise to new desires, thanks to new feelings, more focused on the different parts of the body than on the sexual act itself.

The concept of discomfort or suffering in the decrease in libido

When this drop in libido is causing personal discomfort or the couple suffers from it, it might be time to see an online sex therapist. It is not OK to continue having intimate relations without necessarily wanting to … Or even worse, to force yourself into intimate relations.

It is an attitude that will make you suffer, hurt your relationship, and worsen libido problems, among other things.

There are solutions adapted to everyone. The important thing is not to leave a situation that would cause embarrassment or suffering to one or the other.

In fact, differences in libido are very common in a couple! And this is completely normal. So, we must not put pressure on ourselves because we are going through a period when things are perhaps less natural than at the beginning.

By accepting the differences in libido, it is possible to act, to work and to cultivate his own desire as well as that of his couple; and it’s never too late!

We learn about life every day just as we can learn every day from our relationship, communicate better, build our relationship, based on reciprocity, exchange and sharing.

Decreased desire or lack of libido?
Consult a sex therapist online on Mia.co

Consult an online sex therapist by phone, messaging or video, 7 days a week.

Mia.co: the health platform dedicated to women

Mia.co is a health platform dedicated to women bringing together practitioners all graduated in sexology.

They are supervised by a scientific committee made up of sex therapists and university professors in sexology and executive members of sex therapists associations.

The platform allows all women to consult online one of the specialists in questions of sexuality and / or well-being. The online consultation can take place by 3 modes (telephone, secure messaging or videoconference) and has all of the following advantages:

  • A team of practitioners female sexuality specialists and specially trained in the practice of teleconsultation;
  • A 30-minute consultation at 45 euros (the prices in practice vary from 80 to 100 euros);
  • Product delivery support in 24 or 48 hours;

The data is collected and secured by an approved and certified hosting provider for health data within the meaning of the provisions of article L.1111-8 of the public health code.


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Decreased libido: when and why to consult? Advice from sex therapists


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